Dear Mam

 Today someone mentioned writing letters to loved ones who have passed away and I thought it was such a beautiful idea. I’ve written to Mam a few times in my own way/ texted her as though she’s still here. I thought I’d start a series where every now and then I share a letter I’ve written to her with you. Most of my letters to her are private but I don’t mind posting the odd one. 

19.05.2025

Dear Mam, 

It’s 10 months today without you, 10 months ago you took your last breath and gained your wings. I still miss you as much today as I did 10 months ago. I’m learning new ways to cope without you but a piece of me will always be missing as long as you’re not here. Me and Dad are both looking after each other, I’ve very much stepped into your role when it comes to the house and making sure that things get repaired and replaced when needed. Pumpkin and Honey are as cheeky as ever. They’re still the best gift you ever gave me. They cause so much trouble but make me smile every single day with their gentle and loving personalities. You can definitely tell they’ve had some of your influence with their sassy and bold behaviour! Can you believe they’re 18 months old already?! I wish you could be here to see them! Oh and I now drive myself a few places without worry. I got a new car in September so not long after you passed and she’s a beauty not gonna lie haha. Dad’s not happy as he doesn’t like the colour but me and you both know he doesn’t like white cars. I keep telling him that all cars get dirty it’s not exclusive to white cars! He does love the car though. Sometimes I think he tries to find an excuse to take it for a spin. Your friends are all looking after me. Aunty Clare has become a second Mam. We both went to see the new Snow White together recently and you would have loved it so much. Dopey was so cute I could have cried. I haven’t been back to Disney yet as it doesn’t feel right without you. Maybe one day soon I’ll book a trip as I know I do want to go back. I’m missing the magic so much! I’ve been thinking about the future a lot lately. Who my future partner/ husband will be (I hope you’ve picked out a Prince Charming for me mind!!) and what my future children will be like. It breaks my heart that my partner or children wont get to meet you (unless you already met my partner, who knows who it will be!) but I will tell them all about you. Especially my children, I want them to know their Granny. I’ll show them photographs, videos and tell them so many stories. I’ll never stop missing you Mam. I love you so very much. 

Laura xx